It's A Mystery: Traveling in Nowhere America.

Psst.

I am in a teeny tiny town in Nowhere, NC. I am staying in a little Inn. No, I will not mention the name.

I was sitting in my room on the first floor when I started hearing water run. I didn't pay too much attention right at first, because I thought it might be the refrigerator. Those little things make all sorts of noise.

Then, I realized it sounded more like dripping than anything else, and it wasn't coming from the fridge.

I went into the bathroom to discover the ceiling was leaking. The floor was wet. I was quite surprised.

I went down to the front desk and rang the bell.

The hotel employee looked annoyed when I arrived, and she looked equally annoyed that I was standing there after having checked in about an hour earlier. I gave her my best smile.

Me: Hi! I need another room.

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She sort of glared but I kept speaking despite the look of annoyance.

Me: There is water leaking through the bathroom ceiling.

She raised her eyebrows slightly, shrugged, and went to her computer.

Employee: Well. There is a problem.

Me: Yes. There is water leaking through the bathroom ceiling.

Employee: No. The problem is I'll have to put you on the second floor. We don't have an elevator.

Me: Why do I need to move to the second floor?

Employee: There are no more singles on the first floor, only doubles.

Me: (Thinking that if you've checked me into a room with a leaking ceiling you should apologize, offer me a room on the first floor whether it is a double or not and I move one room over and we call it a day) I don't mind a double.

Employee: Well, it is more expensive.

Me: (I'm not actually paying for this room, and I don't think it is cool to stick the venue with an extra charge because this place has neither good customer service nor waterproof ceilings.) Fine. I don't mind going up to the second floor.

Employee: Okay. Just leave your keys in the room.

Me: Is this common? I mean, do your ceilings often leak?

Employee: No. I've worked here two years and it has never happened before.

The reason I asked is that she was taking it so calmly as if it were just part of what happens. She didn't look worried or surprised or even startled.

I was confused at her lack of affect.

She was making my new room keys and I tried again.

Me: I wonder why the ceiling is leaking.

Employee: I should probably make a note of it. She wrote something down on a piece of paper.

She gave me new keys, and I moved digs.

When I passed room 207, which was right above my old room on the first floor, I saw a "Do Not Disturb" notice hanging on the Door.

Now, I watch lots of procedural crime drama, so I am prepared.

When the police ask, I am going to tell them what happened and my suspicion that the lady at the front desk has done away with the person in 207.

Because I know that at some point, CSI is going to show up and ruin my night by dropping inappropriate one-liners about finding a body in the bath.

All right, universe. Let's do this.

Happy Travels -